numb

bleeds to the gushing death..

Im sitting here with no sense of direction or watsoever.
Maybe this pain is eating me up slowly.
What is my pain or your pain compared to the many more..
I wish I am a healer.
Its easier to swallow them inside..
I am my own enemy.. my nemesis..
I fight.. I struggle..
Yet i succumb to this pain.
Everytime it haunts me.. I cry out to You..
Is this what I am made of?
The gravestone is already carving my name..
Earth craving for my body..
Stab me in the front.. in the back..
Let me bleed in endless despair..
I can feel no pain..
I close my eyes to sleep..
Dream of the dreams i dreamt before..
I see You.. there..
I see myself.. there..
Lying in a pool of blood..
A nightmare.
There in the funeral of the lonely..
I see myself sleeping so peacefully, smiling away..
Is this a dream?
I see my tombstone..
I feel numb..
Im drifting away to the unknown..
I can feel no hurt.. no cry..
Again.. I feel numb.